#WriteFree365 – Day 205: Hello

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(Writing as the first thing I do when I wake is a very interesting wrinkle in my creative process.  Day 205…)

First sight, and I’m dazed.  in going crazy, constantly thinking if I should take a chance…

You have the kind of greeting that sounds exotic
In another language
I know what you’re saying
But don’t know how to reply
Your halo has my thoughts scrambled
The holy in your hola leaves me silent in your presence like the h
I’m at the beginning
Just breathing,
Hoping my exhales are the start of something.

Words get trapped in a labyrinth
I am the Mays
Trying to make contact
Any contact
To say “hey”
And begin the journey around the bases.

But I just get caught looking…

#WriteFree365 – Day 204: 4 Seasons of Loneliness

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(Another rainy day.  Perfect.  Day 204…)

I’m bound under ball and chain, reminiscing our love as I watch four seasons change…

I get it.
Your heart has been through a lot.
I’m not going to minimize it
Any more than you’re currently doing.

You feel
December chill
April showers
Unforgiving July sun
And the decomposing of October leaves.
The calendar is a reminder of empty days without love
There is a season for hurt
And seasons for healing.

No one expects love to end
Whenever it does
It turns sunny days unbearable
Makes you believe you’re falling apart
Brings frigid breezes to hearts frolicking in the snow
And storms while you’re picking rose petals.
But
During that time
Your heart also feels the joys it always does
Yes, your world may be upside down
But it still is your world

Turn the page
Bare all under the sky
Marvel in your change as unnecessary hurt flutters to the ground
Make snow angels out of tears frozen by fear
And when spring comes
Bask in your new growth.

#WriteFree365 – Day 203: Strip For You

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(Sometimes, the doors I walk through produce very clouded freewrites.  However, the idea behind them can be turned into more polished work.  I think today’s entry has one of those ideas.  Day 203…)

Sit back in the chair, baby, because I’m about to go there, my baby…

Sit down.
You are audience
I am entertainment tonight
While we talk, I’ll slowly show you everything.
I have no problems being nude
And if I do
Pleasing you matters more

My goal is to turn you on
To get you so aroused
You’ll want to bare yourself to me, too.
But for now
Follow my instructions and stay in your seat.

As awkward as I may move
With movement embellished like raised inflection
Eye contact
Makes sure you understand everything you see

Button by button
I reveal myself to you
Inhibitions
Trousers deemed unnecessary for this private show.
I promise
Your fantasized idea of me
Is nothing like the man with the stage to myself right now.
Good or not so good.
Seductive or painfully uncoordinated
The true me
Lies beneath the articles I get off my chest.
The fallacies I wear daily
Will be at my feet

All that’s left of me
Is my skin
My heart
And my being.
Do you like what you see?

#WriteFree365 – Day 202: All I Can Give

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(This challenge reminds me that I have no control over what I’m inspired to write.  This is always an interesting subject.  Day 202…)

These pieces of dust is the most I can give…

I know what you want
Everything.
Honestly
Care
Trust
Openness.
I can provide that.

I’m not emotionally available
I told you so you know not to offer your heart
And receive arousal instead
I hope to see you loved
For days eternal
But come any closer
And be satisfied with nights hidden
Respected
Treasured
But buried in secret
I will pirate your loneliness
Parlay it for the high of infatuation
And be gone like yesterday.

You want everything
This is every thing I have for you.

#WriteFree365 – Day 201: Thinking Bout You

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(After a nap, I woke up and immediately decided to freewrite.  As an experimenter at heart, I like putting my mind and soul into various scenarios to see the outcome.  Day 201…)

No, I don’t like you.  I just thought you were cool enough to kick it.  Got a beach house I can sell you in Idaho…

It must be a long journey between my mind and my lips
Memories of us
Healthy and vibrant
Travel between those two destinations
With the fantasy of future fantasies of us as luggage
They pack for unfair weather
But it’s rather windy in my mouth
And there
Words are not as beautiful as advertised.

The confirmation of what our souls already know
Turns cowardly at the edge of my tongue
Ready to jump into the ocean
But the rain from clouds above suggest that
It’s not time to go in water that deep.

“No I don’t.”
Fiction isn’t always fun.

#WriteFree365 – Day 200: To Zion

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(I know I’ve written to my future children a few times before.  I can’t explain it, but some feeling in me loves doing it.  Two hundred straight days of writing.  I never thought I’d see it…)

Now the joy in my world is in Zion…

I written to you times before.
Prayers to the Heaven I’ve yet to cradle to sleep
You’ve yet to reach Amen
But I understand that blessing soon come

Thank Our Father
For believing I still have enough of His image
To make my personal Savior
A gift to a world immersed in selfishness
Your light will lead it to a better future
And this is just my planetary circumstance

I’ll sacrifice every facet of my being humanly possible
If it means you never see Calvary
Your road through the garden in Gethsemane shall have many roses
No thorns.
I’ll prick my fingers so you never spill a drop of blood
Or tears.

I will fail.
Perfection is meant for The Almighty
But you’ll never cry out that I’ve forsaken you
You are my son
The paradise I strive to see
And I’d die sif it means you live eternally.

#WriteFree365 – Day 199: Puzzled By People

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(Spotify does it again.  This was found based on their recommendations.  The lyrics to this are…I encourage you to listen.  Day 199…)

Sometimes, you have to find out for yourself.  Sometimes, you need to be told.  Sometimes, you never find the answer…

I’ve spent hours touching you
Unscrambling your flesh to see the carefully colored finished product
Your soul
Is time consuming.
Challenging
Frustrating and fun.
Even when I laid your cover flat
I could see the picture

But this is about the journey
From pile of nothing
A collection of fractured love
But a jigsaw doesn’t require missing pieces
Everything it needs to be solved resides in its container
Search yourself to compete yourself.

The words are blank
Time is currency earned
Constant focus on a solution
Love letters bringing me closer to you
Revolution after revolution
Spending time believing I owed you vows
But after while
Guessing stopped being fun.

So those letters
Became words that didn’t fit you
Clues that didn’t make sense
Stuck in a cross
Take too long
And I never figure you out
Move hastily
And you suffer the fate of every puzzle with a mistake
You believe you’re worthless.

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